Q&A

Photography // Saudalia Dress + choker // Wight Gold use code: ABBY15

_____________ Q&A _____________

I often get messaged, or asked in person, many similar questions so I decided to do a little Q&A about our family. (I also threw in some random get to know me questions too)

Q: where are you guys from? 

A: I'm from the United States and Josh is from Ghana, West Africa (I'm sure he was the one you were really interested in anyway 😉) 

Q: how tall are you? 

A: I'm a little over 5ft. and Josh is a couple over 6 ft. -so it makes for difficult selfies together haha

Q: How did you two meet?

A: we initially met through our mutual good friend (Detroit Lions NFL player, just in case anyone is a fan haha). Josh had been best friends with him for years and I had become friends with him after being lined up on a blind date- while Josh was serving an LDS mission in Detroit. When Josh came home, he introduced us to each other and encouraged Josh to ask me out!  

(disclaimer: I'm not a huge fan of some of these questions, but I want to answer them because I know most people mean well and are just trying to understand)

Q: How did your parents react when you and Josh got engaged- you know, with him being from Africa...?

A: (I hold back a sarcastic remark, and smile) 

My parents didn't really care that he is from Africa. They only cared if he was going to be a good husband for me. At very first, (like first 2 months of dating) they were a little bit interested in the challenges that cultural differences might bring... Then we dated for about a year and half and they got to know him, and his character, and they really grew to love him. I guess I could say they "approved"- but it was my decision anyway. 

Q: is it difficult to be married to someone who grew up with such a different culture than you?

A: honestly, if you think about it, every marriage is made of two people who grew up differently from each other and who brings their own "culture" into their marriage. Which is exactly why marriage is about coming together to create your own new family dynamic. 

I have to admit, there are some things that come up for us that I never thought I'd have to discuss with my future spouse because they just seemed so common and normal to me while growing up in America. 

Like: will we celebrate Santa? Or how do you pronounce "hippopotamus"?

But seriously, there's things and differences we definitely work through, and compromises we make, but I honestly love having another culture apart of our home! Especially having spent a lot of time in Africa myself, I have a love and idea of where he's coming from! 

Overall, we dated long enough to know what we were getting into, and have enough love and respect for each other that it's not something we have to think about everyday.

Q: (similar question. It makes me sad that I still get this question ALL the time)

"hi, Abby! I am dating a black guy that I really love but my parents don't approve because of the color of his skin. How were you able to get your parents to approve? Or what can I do to help my parents be more open minded?"

A: First off, I have to say that no matter anyone's race or color there is a certain amount of respect that needs to be earned. If your boyfriend is treating you well, being honest, kind, and a truly a good person, I would hope your parents could naturally come to "approve"- that is for people who have an open heart. 
Unfortunately, if your parents are truly racists that's a different problem. At that point I say love who treats you right, and if he treats you right, don't rely on your parents approval. They need to work through their issues on their own-and I've seen it happen- but first you need to be the better person and continue to love both them and your boyfriend- praying they will eventually have their hearts softened and come around.

Q: what religion do you belong to?

A: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormon) 

Q: what's your favorite restaurant?

A: I can never decide but probably Bombay House right now! (Indian) 

Q: how many countries have you traveled to? 

A: not counting airport stops, 14: Bahamas, Canada, Cayman Islands, Ethiopia, Ghana, India, Kenya, Mexico, Nepal, Netherlands, Rwanda, Uganda, United Kingdom, United States

Q: will you guys make a YouTube channel?

A: I'm surprised to have this question asked a lot because we are really not very exciting! But we've thought about it... I need ideas though!? 

Q: AANNNDD the #1 most asked question...

How do you pronounce your last name? 

A: I wish I could put a recording on here! but in my mind, the best way to write out how it sounds would be: "bwah-hin" 

Let me know if I've missed anything! 

And feel free to leave a Q&A about yourself as well! I'd love to get to know you!